Int. Lounge

Jostein: What would you know, you’re just some robot!
Wes: I’ll have you know I used to control this ENTIRE ship.
Luke: Wes, you only control the ship hundreds of years in the future; remember all that time travelling that happened?
Wes: No. I mean yes.
Jostein’s Dog: You’re not thinking forth-dimensionally!
Wes, Yeah, I have a real problem with that.

Luke: Jostein, why don’t you ever take your dog for a walk?
Jostein: That’s not my dog.

The Lounge SHUDDERS, and doesn’t take up millions of Kb this time.

Jostein’s Dog: Eh, that wasn’t me.



INTRO SEQUENCE – SOCK OF DEATH!


Int. Bridge

TE: Kramer!! What the hell are you doing?!
Kramer: Well, Executor, we seem to have hit a slight snag.
TE: That’s not a snag. It’s very plainly an asteroid. Which you crashed into.


Int. Lounge.

TE: Jostein, come help me fix the engines.
Jostein: Fix them? What, did someone take a hammer to them or something?
Dog: Yeah, that was TE last week.

TE kicks Jostein’s Dog across the room. Dog falls on its back and can’t right itself.
TE and Jostein leave the room

Dog: Erm, little help here? Anyone? Oh, never mind, I’ll just sleep here.


Int. Engine room.

TE and Jostein are in the engine room. TE is kneeling down and has his head sticking into some sort of machine. Jostein is holding a toolbox.

TE: Spanner.
Jostein: Spanner *hands TE a spanner.*
TE: Screwdriver
Jostein: Screwdriver *hands TE a screwdriver*
Jostein: Is the only reason I’m here to hand you equipment?
TE: Bandage.
Jostein: Heh.
TE: I’m serious. My head is bleeding quite severely.
Jostein: Oh, I see.
TE: No, you don’t see, otherwise you’d be screaming with horror.
Jostein: Do you need a hand?
TE: I could really do with a blood transfusion right now, thanks.
Jostein: I’ll go get Baz.

Jostein walks out. TE’s body slumps as he loses consciousness.


Int. Baz’s Room. Jostein, Baz, Wes.

Jostein: Give blood.
Baz: Hmmmmm, hmmmm, I don’t think so.
Jostein: Give blood
Baz: No.
Jostein: I’ll give you a sock.
Baz: No.
Jostein: A pair of socks?
Baz: YOU give blood
Jostein: Absolutely not.
Wes: I’ll give blood.
Jostein: Hey Wes, this statement is false.
Wes: WHAT?!!!?!

Wes explodes.

Jostein: Hehehe. So anyway, 
Baz: NO.
Jostein: Fine, it’s your decision. But as First Mate, I’m overruling it.
Baz: DAMN YOU OLD MAN!
Jostein: I’m not old.
Baz: I know; I was talking about that guy in the corner.
Old man in the corner: Uh, whaaa?


Int. Lounge. Luke and Kramer.

Luke: I don’t feel actively involved in this plotline.
Kramer: Me neither. Let’s do something eye-catching.
Luke: How about a little jig?

Luke and Kramer do a jig, to the sound of that thing in JHBA2.


Int. Kitchen. TE is already on a table, Jostein is strapping Baz to the table, and Heather is wearing a nurse’s hat.

Heather: Okay, strap the subjects to the table.
Baz: Why do we have to do this in the kitchen?
Heater: If I were you, I’d be more worried about why I’m about to perform the transfusion instead of a qualified nurse.
Baz: Waaaah!

Heather gets out a VERY LARGE syringe. Bazzu faints.

Jostein: What’s that for!?!
Heather: Saves money on anaesthetic.
Jostein: Oh, okay

Heather gets out a normal sized syringe now, after putting away the huge one.

Blank screen.

Int. Lounge.

Jostein: So TE, how’s your new blood?
TE: It’s rather sock… SOCK!?! DID I JUST SAY SOCK?!?
Baz: That must be my Sock.N.A working.
TE: WHAT?!?
Baz: Yes, I’m genetically mutated to like socks. The blood must be making you all… socky.
TE: WHY YOU LITTLE…
Baz: Waah! Jostein made me!
TE: Here Baz, take your blood back. I’ll have some of Jostein’s instead.

TE grabs Jostein and pulls him off-screen, much to Jostein’s horror

Jostein: [horror sounds]