Jostein: Guys, I did an IQ test! And my score was 120!
TE: What.
Jostein: 120!
TE: Get out.
Jostein: No really! Here’s the score card!
TE: No, I mean get out. We don’t want your type in here.
Jostein: My ‘type’?
TE: Anyone with an IQ of over 100 deserves my WRATH.
Kramer: Why not sell your wrath on eBay?
TE: Duh, nobody with an IQ of over 100 would buy from eBay.


INTRO SEQUENCE – RADIO STATION OF DEATH!


Baz: Hey guys, I’ve thought of a cool way to solve our money problems!
Luke: We have money problems!? WWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!

Luke runs out the room.

Heather: If your idea involves socks, Baz, forget it.
Baz: What if it doesn’t?
Heather: I’ll leave Threatener and start going out with you.
Baz: My idea doesn’t involve socks.
Heather: Well, I changed my mind anyway.
Baz: Damn you.
Heather (to TT): Let’s snuggle.
TT: Okay.
Baz: Damn you all.

The Snail walks across the room.

Wes: We should probably get rid of that thing sometime.
Jostein: What?! Who are you?
Wes: I’m Wes, the ship’s autopilot.
Jostein: I’ve never seen you before.
Wes: I’ve never seen you before neither:
Dog: What are you talking about? You’ve both known each other for over a year.
Jostein: Sorry, I got stuck in a Futurama loop.
Dog: You’re weird.
Jostein: You’re not my dog.
Dog: It’s true.

Baz: Does anyone want to hear my idea?
TE: NO.

Blank screen.

Int. Baz’s room.

Baz: These thousands of pounds of radio transmitting equipment had better be worth the money.

Baz: Testing, testing, 1 2 3.
A voice: Hey, why don’t you say something more original?
Baz: Hey, this is a commercial radio station! I’m the only one allowed to talk.
A voice: Need a sponsor?
Baz: Sure. Who are you?
A voice: This. Is God.

DUHDUH!

Baz: Hi.
God: Amazon.com sure took a while to deliver this radio to Heaven.
Baz: You should ask for their money back
God: Nah, that flood and thunderstorm was much more fun.
Baz: I see.

Baz: So… you can… do stuff?
God: I can do anything you like, my good chum.
Baz: What like?
God: It’s easier to list things that I can’t do.
Baz: What’s that, then, that you can’t do?
God: Nothing.
Baz: So you can do anything?
God: That is correct.
Baz: Do you wear socks?
God: No.
Baz: Well, don’t expect me to worship you then.
God: Okay, I’ll put you on the “Hell” list, then.
Baz: Are there socks in Hell?
God: Yes. The Devil has something of a sock obsession.
Baz: Oh boy oh boy.

Blank screen.

Picture of a radio.

Voiceover: It’s All-Day-Every-Day with Bazzu!
Voiceover: All-Day-Every-Day with Bazzu is sponsored by GOD: “Worship me!”

Baz: Well, we ran out of CDs to play two weeks ago, so now it’s time for my new article, “Jostein’s top ten words!”, which have been worked out by our high tech system, Wes!

Wes: Hi Baz. Well, the ship’s going through an asteroid field, but I’m too tired to fly, so I did this instead.

10. Chump
9. Shut
8. Up
7. Bazzu.
6. Not
5. Absolutely
4. That’s
3. Not
2. Daffodil

And Jostein’s number one most frequently uttered word; the word which, if uttered, will finish this entire list, is:

1. Dog

Baz: This isn’t a productive area of discussion. So basically, I’m bored, sleepy, and am going to bed now. I’ll let Wes sing some of his self-written songs now; there should be time to hear them about 906 times before lunch.

God (listening to the radio): Worst. Radio Show. Ever.